lauren: why i hate stationary bikes...and some thoughts about lakes.

I hate stationary bikes.

First of all, the majority of the fun of riding a bike is wind. Not biking in the wind; that sucks big time. But the wind you create, the wind you generate from a fast ride down a sloping street, that's the dog's bollocks.

Stationary bikes take this away from you, and replace it with a ridiculously uncomfortable saddle that sitting on is like straddling some abstract sculpture and then pedaling fiercely down a bumpy road. If abstract sculptures had wheels. And gears. Etc.

And the resistance is all off. What a stationary bike tells you is flat, or no resistance, is far too easy. You end up pedaling too fast and it feels like it's doing nothing at all. Then, often with no warning, it'll shoot you up some ridiculous hill and then get mad at you for slowing down.

Fuck that. I can't wait for all the snow to melt. I might stop calling it snow and instead refer to it poutingly as, 'the white stuff that stops me from riding bikes and makes me ride a smelly bus to work' (is there an Eskimo word for THAT?).

Sigh.

And then there's this.

Lakes.

The swim portion will be in a lake.

I'm a good swimmer, right? But I have this thing about lakes. Usually when I'm in one, this thought is never far from the front of my mind:



I'm pretty sure no matter what body of water I'm swimming in, this thing is not far away. And it loves leg meat.

This could make me swim faster, but it could also make me panic, and swim too fast, and then be totally shot for the other two parts of the race. That's why, when ever I'm swimming in a normal, civilized pool, I like to imagine little mini versions of this monster chasing me down so that I get used to swimming like serious shit is going down.

----

In all seriousness? I have a question about the mechanics of the swim portion. Is it going to be mass chaos at the starting line? Will I struggle to swim properly because I'll be splashed in the face constantly by a hundred other athletes? Can you see where you're going, or do you have to pop your head up occasionally to judge your distance.

Help a sister out. What's the lowdown on triathlon lake swimming?